The ink was dried mostly about 2 months ago. And the story ended or thought of even before then.
Except the last 2 drawn figures, the last one actually was my memory of one of my aunty’s photo as one day I thought about my only childhood life that family provided to me, I like the drawing so much that I can’t help to get it in, maybe I will work it into the story, any way, I know what these people do, how they think, what they likes and dislikes, how they talk, how they walk… I know their habits, their passion, and all their traits and personality, their triumph, their pain and struggles… Because they all live in my mind. The pace of putting it on writing is very slow.
Life is very harsh literally esp. at that time when I was confined in one small corner all day all night long in order to survive all different organic compounds and chemical agents, from the monsters who live next to me and who knows I am weak and sensitive, like incomplete burn woods, coal, Kerosine or likely BBQ starter, cigarette, mosquito coil, all kinds insect killing aerosol sprays, detergents, coolant, degreaser like wd 40, burning grease like 12hr straight until I wailed and coughed a storm 3-4am, and they decided that they got to sleep and get up to work the next day.
What’s the big deal right? what if you suck in these nasty vapors in like 12 hours daily for years?
These actually are light weight, the worse ones were “introduced” at the beginning of this “chemical war” since Dec 27, 2014 when I woke up with a purple face and hugely sacked eyes I only realized the air was the culprit until 1-2weeks later. My head was unbelievably heavy, my stomach churning, I was unbelievably drained like walking on cloud even though I slept through the night. There were unfamiliar molecules in the air that cause your skin break in and bubble up; your eyes “glued” down together with your eye lashes with so much puss oozing out from your eyes; your throat bloody red course and you cough blood out that you finish a whole bag of the strongest cough drop 20times the recommended; your heart pounding you woke up and dashed out of the house a few times every night wondering in the neighborhood, or you know you are going to be in big trouble; your gum infected and let out mouthful after mouthful of blood, I am not kidding, I am weak, but I live super clean cause I have a squeaking wheel body, I never have any kind of weir stuff go on with my body like that, it was so scary. And the pain is so bad you literally want to die and end it all and I don’t have pain killer at hand, I haven’t taken had any med counter or prescribe for god know how many years, and the fever, and the trauma that you have to take your natural tooth out, but, it’s done, what are you going to do? cry and complain, yes, and then you wipe your tears to go on with your life like nothing happened so it’d be easier on yourself.
The rest? dizziness, sore throat, tight chest, chest pain, nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, joint pain, muscle pain, stomachache, frequent headache I rarely experience otherwise…
Oh yeah, these criminals have no problem shooting water directly on you face soaking you up head to toe, destroying your properties, destroying your landscape right in front of your eyes, exposing their private parts (I can’t stress how traumatized I am. Unlike most of my counterparts whoI don’t like to lay my eyes on stranger’s skin below the neck to begin with, let alone private part of someone I despised) the, threatening to jump over to beat the crap out of you, and the ugliest lowest possible vile language that I’d never ever heard of and never thought they could be uttered out of one’s mouth and digested me in no end, like I don’t have certain clean female body part… ok, I am throwing up. Well,
I am so tired of going to E.R. so many times with all kinds tubes sticking to you with all the noises, lights and monitoring on for hours and hours in cold and prob dangerous environment where those super germs are discovered, and, the bills.
Thank God I am extremely knowledgeable about all kinds of natural remedies and modalities, otherwise, I might be well 6ft under by now. I don’t know.
Life is down right miserable pure hell when the air is real bad, that’s for sure, there’s no other way to put it.
Guess what, you think the bad guys are supposed to be brought in by law enforcement straightened up according to the law written in black and white, right? no, guess who are served and protected, the villains. The victim is victimized all over again by “law enforcers”the lawyers and the court. Oh yeah, everybody lied, cheated, harassed. The only honest and innocent, the only one that shouldn’t be ashame, of the whole process, me, is punished in all level, when I video tape asshole idle car for over an hour to choke the heck out of me, I got a harassment case; God knows how many false category of police reports were written on me, the victim, 20? 30? in the period of 1.5 yrs. of course, none prosecuted cause it’s just nonsense.
Oh yeah, you called that evil emptied out whole can of insecticide in the air against my edible plants, oh, no we couldn’t smell anything. Alright, what about spitting on my face? Ok, will check. And what dose the report say, nothing, not in the
Through it all, I’ve never shed a tear facing these a holes scum bags, that’s what they are to me, I’ve never let my spirit down, even though they smoke or choke the heck out of me every time I sing my hearts out feeling high and excited, or in the yard collecting my organic papaya, tangerine, pomegranate, my mustard green, moringa…even though I’ve never dared to take a single vacation for 3-4 years straight vs 2-3/yr. to different part of the world.
Oh yeah, I am so good at planning my trip like a real research, def. make a penny stretch to a dollar like everything else I did, hahaha, god knows how may google earth and pictures I looked at, how many travel books I flip through, usually around 20, how many travel package I looked through and travel plan I plotted out to make sure we would visit the most exiting unique place and see the best scenery, within our time frame, and if cruise, train and fly is not the best option, which usually isn’t unless its in European continent, and the Caribbean, how many calculation of driving hours and distant I mapped out so we go nuts driving crazy at night go through as many place in a whole big country in a week or 2 with a tiny budget, haha. Oh, I’ve seen a lot taken tens thousands pictures, like see though crystal lakes 20 ft deep and you though a few feet cause it’s so clear, or 10-20 wild Cockatoo Bird lined up cover your cottage railing patiently and obediently taking turn to get its share of bread from moi, oh god, kill me now, I like that soooo much, oh, the blue lake, and the herds of kangaroos we are not supposed to see but god damn Genie, the gps I named, got us onto this dirt road that no viehchle was supposed to be in, hahaha, …
but there are a lot more I know waiting for me to see.. I do hope I survive the ordeal and cross out my bucket list even if I have to do it alone, no big deal.
It’s hard not to have that. But you adjust some how…
So it’s definitely an escape for me. It’s so nice to be in love everyday to take your mind to some where nice and dreamy in the fantasy land.
( to be finished and edited)
Yes, my aunty is that beautiful. Although now that I think about that, this is a bit more Caucasian flair. Her face is a bit shorter and rounder, her eye and hair darker, she’s less regal more nurturing and motherly in that picture of hers years ago. But all the lines and shapes are similarly smooth and supple.
She is my mother’s elder sister. She is not the only beauty in the family. Actually 4 kids of my mother’s siblings are like from the beauty pageant if there was any. I don’t remember anybody in all my years in China with that kind of good look with such symmetry and perfect angles.
The genes are pretty funny. The elder 2, my aunty and her elder brother are both tall and very fair with supple and rounded lines, with skin like porcelain; while the younger 2, my mother and the youngest boy are both are way darker and shorter with sharp jaw lines and everything. What’s even funnier is that the physicaI don’t remember anybody else l features also goes with the temperaments .
“Love is a song, love is a poem” What does that even mean? nothing, other than that it sounds cool for a lyrics. Like anything else, love means way more simpler and practical as I grow, from magical, rainbow, unicorn, white knight-ish, to simply mean that you have a home wherever you go, with a structure or not, where you will be sheltered, where you will find endless supply of love, caring, passion, support and understanding… no matter what happens, how many problems you have, you know you have each other, you’d be fine, that you look at each other’s eyes, you know you are home, your heart is settled with so much peace and happiness, that you can sleep throughout any storms, that you have a buddy you can talk through anything in your mind and explore anything fun together, that you’d build your future together, that you have somebody to cry with you and laugh with you, that when you are thirsty, a drink is in front of you, when you feel tired, you will get a good massage and warm socks, all without asking, when you finish your work together, you simply chill out sharing some good food together, talking mindlessly….
Actually this is more of a partner than love, that, is another whole new level. Nope, love alone is not enough.
I love rainbow, I love unicorn… they are beautiful, they are fascinating, they are exciting. But I will choose life over the fancy in a minute if I have to pick. That’s something that counts.
Love shouldn’t been expected as a mean to solve anybody’s problem, that’s not how that works; love doesn’t have to mean you have to have another warm body, you can, you should, you have to always love and count on yourself, even though it’s not the same
Life couldn’t be more sweet and wonderful. Good luck everyone. We all deserve love.
Finally love means Audrey Hepburn — my top 3
(ok, watched again, hv 2say d movie is h-a– what can I say, not as good as I remember, maybe now I have seen so many good movies)
Here she go, hahaha, cute as a button, sweet, lovely and innocent as an angel. She always has the ability to make you feel how sweet love is and how precious life is.
How come she’s so lucky, drugged like that got picked up by such a handsome gentleman, instead of the police or worse a rapist? How come I am clear minded, all I got is either people with no job wanted to settle down (what? haha) or get a girlfriend, or young student who want to get some actions. Hehe, thank you, that’s a bit too much more than lip services.
Pretty liars, public relations and selling fertilizer, haha.
Glad I had a chance to see Rome. But I can’t say it’s much a holiday nor do I miss it that much, together with all the other dirty crowded smoky cities or countries in south Europe like Madrid, Barcelona…
It is a cruise stop. I found it the best buck for the money room and board and all food included less than $100/day per person. Of course you are really pampered in a cruise ship. I booked for the one with the most ports stop possible of course at a good price. We stopped by every ports. Being so greedy, every time we stretch to the last minute ran the hell out back to the ship before they left us behind. It was mighty fun. The food at the cruise ship was divine. I am the only one who asked for the second dish, soon everyone followed suit, haha, real rotten. The food in any cruise destinations are in general very good, but the one in Europe has to be the best. One unforgettable dish is the Osso Bucco. OMG. When I have something that good, I just feel like I can die. Well I attempted to make some back home. Never came out the same because the cut of the shank is totally different. That has to be the one dish I can’t duplicate. Yep, I pretty much to make everything after I taste them even though I don’t have the recipe nor know what’s in them. Been to a few cruise. Someday, I’d like to go to the Antatica one for a change. Probably would be fun, probably would freeze me to death. Will see. I need to work way harder, get my affair wrapped up sooner.
Any way, not impressed by Rome. Didn’t get into the Colosseum, with miles of long line. Did got robbed there, haha, not really and not much. There were a few including these some what handsome pair dress in Rome soldiers with hamlet, sword etc., like the ones we saw in the movies. We were looking at them trying to take pictures. They approached us, then all of a sudden one of them scoped me off the ground, what, excuse me? God. I have to say that I was a bit flattered, but mostly, I wanted to jumped out from his grip.